Earnestly seeking answers

A brief recap: I started college in 1999. I attended part-time and full-time, as finances and health allowed, for the better part of three years. Then we moved to Utah, and when we returned, things were put on hold again so that we could focus on getting Gus through school. He graduated this past summer and more and more, my thoughts have been on finally getting back and finishing my degree.

What that degree will be has been up in the air for a while. I have toyed with the idea of being an LPC (licenced professional counselor), specifically treating eating disorders, since my first semester of college. I battled with bulimia through my teenage years and was finally able to get a handle on it with the help of a dietician and eating disorder therapist. That experience, and the expertise of both of those professionals, has informed much of my desire to go into that field. It was their help that enabled my own efforts to finally take shape towards healing. As I went through my psychology coursework, that experience came back to me again and again and I would think, "Wow. I could be that for someone else." I planned for a long time to go to graduate school and get my masters degree in counseling psychology. But that plan sounded so long and complicated that for a time, I wondered if it might be a smarter option to do something shorter, more practical. Being a dietician seemed to fit the bill. It only requires a bachelor's degree and I thought, "Yay. Best of both worlds-- a meaningful career AND something I can finish quickly."

After much thought and research, I decided to check out the dietetics program at OSU (the only program in our state). I drove down to Corvallis early this week and met with an advisor for the program. And though I'm still interested in the idea, it's less practical than I had thought. Only 20 of my 72 amassed credits will transfer into their program. And I'd have at least three years of coursework ahead of me-- a year or so of general science courses, like biochem and anatomy, and then two years of concentrated dietetics courses. And those two years have to be on campus, in Corvallis. The day that I drove down wasn't too bad. But two years of 160 miles round trip three or four days a week? That might be another situation entirely.

That night when I came home, my mind was having a hard time wrapping around all of the obstacles that had been raised that afternoon. As I sat trying to dialogue it with Gus, he said, "Well, what about grad school?" "Oh yeah," I thought. "What about grad school?" I have about a year and a half left to finish my bachelor's degree if I go back to the path I'd been on. A grad program would be two or three years past that, so the time lines would be fairly equivalent, and in the end, I'd have a graduate degree.

So now I'm back to square one to some extent. I'm exploring grad programs, setting up appointments with some of my psych professors and others who might have insight, making sure that I have all of the information that I need to make a decision that will affect my life, and our life, for years to come. It feels a bit overwhelming but it's also very, very exciting. I'll be writing about this more for sure.